“I get by with a little help from my friends.”
Lennon and McCartney
A family member of mine who has never, ever, ever (feel free to sing Taylor Swift in your head if you must) asked me for an opinion, or help ever before in my life called last week seeking advice.
After I picked myself up off the floor from a dead faint, I had a blast sharing what knowledge I had with this person I love. It. Felt. So. Good.
It felt so good to be asked, to be valued, to know that they cared about my opinion on something and believed in me enough to want to garner knowledge from me. It felt even better to know after all of these years of me asking this family member for ideas, answers and sometimes actually sending them S.O.S.’s that I was able to give just the tiniest thing back in return.
At the end of our call I said, “I do believe that’s the first time you’ve ever asked me for advice.”
Their answer dumbfounded me. “I’m not good at asking for help. It makes me feel needy.”
And all these years, I’d felt this dear, dear person, who I looked up to, didn’t value my opinion.
They didn’t sound needy. They sounded like a friend. It felt like relationship. It felt fulfilling and gratifying from my end. Just like it felt rewarding and reassuring every time this person helped me in the past. That’s what help looks and feels like. Like friendship. Like love.
It’s okay to ask for help. Better than okay. You’ll gain the knowledge you need, an opinion of someone who’s gone before and build someone else up in the process. And you know the best person to seek advice from? God! So whatever has you puzzled, perplexed or stressed out today, ask someone who you value their opinion. It will make them feel valued, and you'll get some helpful hints. And make sure you ask God too. He always has your best interest in mind, and whenever you ask, He says it will be given to you.
Laura L. Smith