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We hear a lot of buzz around the word community. We see it depicted so perfectly in shows like Sweet Magnolias where three women have been best friends since childhood and still share all their dreams and hopes and worries with one another, even starting a business together. But in the real world on the other side of the Netflix screen it’s sometimes more challenging to find those kinds of relationships.  People move, demands on our time and energy are high, and schedules are busy and often don’t match up with people we’d like to connect with. So why should we prioritize community when it feels like it’s out of reach or a lot of work? Community gives us a sense of belonging, a feeling of security and support, and reminds us that we have purpose. Things most of us crave. God’s Word illustrates the importance of community. In the opening pages of the Bible God declares “It isn’t good for man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18). Jesus tells the disciples that if two of them ask for something in His name their prayer will be answered and that if two or three folks gather in Jesus’ name, then He’ll be there with them (Matthew 18:19-20). And the author of Hebrews instructs us to not give up meeting together, but instead to encourage each other (Hebrews 10:24-25).  there's a reason for all this hype around community Mental health research shows that people with a healthy community have lower rates of depression, anxiety, and stress. Yes, please to all of that. So what does this mean for me and you?
 Hebrews 10:24-25 But how?
We’re going to spend the next few weeks talking about some different kinds of community you can engage in and grow in as well as some ways to plug into existing communities or even create your own. Be on the lookout for some emails in your inbox (if you’re not signed up already for my emails–shoot me a message) and my stories on Facebook and Instagram. Meanwhile, I’m praying that we all connect with people who inspire, support, encourage, and point us to the love of Jesus.
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Today, my beautiful, talented, Gilmore Girls loving, rom-com writing friend, Betsy St. Amant Haddox is guest blogging AND we're giving away a copy of her brand new book, Once Upon a Divorce. As a divorce survivor and single mom, Betsy St. Amant Haddox shares her own raw, unfiltered story of what happens after the fairy tale ends. In her humorous, vulnerable, and authentic way, Betsy recounts how she navigated her ex-husband's abandonment and the seeming silence from heaven that followed. She takes readers through the thorny path of figuring out life as a single mother, healing from loss, and finding God to be faithful through it all. Once Upon a Divorce proves that the end of a marriage isn't the end of the story.
And now from Betsy.... Whoever says God doesn’t have a sense of humor has clearly never gone through anything difficult. I don’t mean that irreverently. I mean it literally. Some of the funniest things happened during my darkest season of divorce. And not just laugh-out-loud moments, but irony or things others might chalk up to coincidence that I know are otherwise. There are several instances where the humor wasn’t evident until years after the fact. Such as the time my husband had only been moved out for a few months, and I happened to look down while washing my hair in the shower and saw something that most definitely was not supposed to be sitting on the drain between my feet. A scorpion. Let’s just say the arachnid didn’t make it, and he probably also went deaf before he kicked the proverbial bucket (RIP). That poor creature represented everything unfair in that season of my life and really got it. Or the time when another wildlife creature burrowed up under the lining of my trailer and died, and Billy the Exterminator’s (remember that show?) nephew had to come dig it out. (Yes, that experience was as gross as it sounds.) Possibly the most ironic was the time when I almost canceled a first date with a nice single dad because I was so fed up with the entire dating process (more on that in the book) but then ended up going anyway and eventually marrying him.  It’s amusing how God works. Folks often refer to Christianity as the upside-down kingdom. Things typically don’t go the way we expect or hope. Jesus talked about how the least will be made great and the great will be made small. In the upside-down kingdom, leaders serve. Humility is advancement. Sacrifice is honored. Less is more. And in losing our life, we gain it. I don't know where you're feeling upside-down today. Maybe you're not going through a divorce, but you're in a different hard season that feels out of sorts. Shaky. Distorted. Maybe you're dealing with a prodigal child, aging parents, death, grief, financial strain, or some sort of major life transition. Maybe nothing specific has happened, but you wish it would. Maybe you're still single and longing to find a spouse. Maybe you're waiting for that healing, that break through, that promotion or progression that seems like it's never going to arrive. Whatever it is, may I remind you that we can be firmly planted in this upside-down kingdom, on a Rock that never shifts? In this particular kingdom, one that makes little sense to the world, we can thrive. We can have peace and joy not because of our circumstances, but because of the One sovereignly in charge of them all. We can have success, not because of dollars signs and bottom lines but because of focusing on our eternal inheritance that can't be destroyed. (1 Peter 1:3-5) When we cling to the fact that God is writing our story, that this hard chapter isn't the end, that there are so many more pages ahead, we can release our death grip on control. Because He's got a grip on us. Okay, how can you win your FREE copy? Message me one word about how your life is feeling upside down right now. I'll randomly select a winner within a week and Betsy will send you a copy (open only to continental U.S. residents over the age of 18).  In other news...I have a new book releasing February 6! Betsy and I wrote these books during the same time period. I can't tell you how many calls, texts, prayers, and voice memos flew between us as we dove into some painful parts of our stories to reveal God's faithfulness and love. I even interviewed Betsy for my book :). You can pre-order a copy of Holy Care for the Whole Self HERE!
For more inspiration find me on Facebook and Instagram Listen, I’m not a food blogger or an expert in any way about being a hostess. But I do love the holidays and over the years I’ve experienced some crazy, stressful Thanksgivings traveling with infants and toddlers, trying to fit in feedings and naps and keep everyone with food allergies safe. I’ve been in a kitchen with half a dozen grown women running around frantically twenty minutes 'till mealtime with oven doors flying open, knives wielded, people snapping at each other, and everyone’s tension escalating everyone else’s stress. I bet you have some stories to share as well.  picture perfect Thanksgiving table I’ve also experienced more relaxing Thanksgivings where it didn’t seem to matter what time we ate or that we forgot one of the side dishes in the fridge. When cooking was a team effort full of laughter and tasting as we stirred and chopped. When I felt God’s love tangibly in the room and my heart was truly thankful. And although some of the stresses of Turkey Day can’t be avoided or even expected, there are things we can proactively do to make this year’s Thanksgiving the best version of itself.  Not in a selfish “this is how I want it” way, but in a “this is how God made me and I’m going to embrace myself” way. Our culture is all about the picture perfect Thanksgiving, the kind Chip and JoJo would orchestrate in a home they designed with food prepared from Jo’s cookbook. Your friends, acquaintances, television, and social media will share a thousand and eight new recipes you’ll want to try this year, some adorable, simple decorations you can make for less than $9/each, and comfortable, casual, yet awesome outfits you should definitely be wearing. All these things are great. New recipes are fun. Decor feels festive. And I do love a cute outfit. But hear me and hear me loudly, YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO ALL THE THINGS! If you love to cook–chef up your favorites. Spend a couple days leading up to Thursday making those homemade rolls with the dough that needs to rise overnight and browning the flour for the gravy (it’s a thing–a family tradition on my dad’s side). If you’re attending a large gathering, sign up to bring multiple dishes. If you don’t like to cook. Don’t. Delegate the cooking. Order a fully-cooked turkey, bagged salad, and instant mashed potatoes from Kroger. Or offer to wash the dishes or entertain the kids to allow someone else the freedom to be in the kitchen. Or buy scrumptious bagels, fresh fruit and coffee from a local cafe for breakfast. Same holds true for decorating or running in the local race or participating in the annual family Turkey Bowl. If you love to decorate, go all out. If you don’t. Light a candle that smells like Fall Leaves or an Autumn Walk or Pumpkin Spice and call it a day. If you’re a runner, run. If not, give a polite pass, or participate in the walking portion of the race. If you love football, bring your gym shoes to participate in the family game. If not, cheer on the sidelines. You get the idea. God made you love cooking or great with kids or with a passion to make things spotless or provided you extra money in your account. Use the gifts He gave you and don’t wear yourself out trying to be someone you’re not. You’ll have more fun, be less exhausted, and make the contribution you specifically were designed to contribute, allowing others to make theirs.  If you need to go to bed early, be honest and say, “I love you all, but I really need to call it a night.” If being around alcohol or nuts or something else is potentially harmful for you don’t serve them or politely ask your host ahead of time if these items could be avoided. If you are traveling and your day ends better with a piece of chocolate or the sound of a portable fan or begins better with a specific coffee creamer –bring those things with you. If you need a moment or ten by yourself, graciously excuse yourself to go to your room or take a walk or whatever you need to do to be able to breathe deeply, whisper a prayer, gather yourself. You don’t have to be “on” the whole weekend.  It sounds so simple, right? But have you prayed about your Thanksgiving? Have you asked God to make it enjoyable? Have you asked Him to help you find peace? Have you asked Him how you can make it simpler? Or how you could make it simpler or more enjoyable for someone else? Have you asked Jesus to help you get along with the person you always seem to struggle with? God is available 24/7 and wants to hear everything you’re excited or worried or disappointed about or overwhelmed by this Turkey Day. Bring it all to Him. He loves you. He is with you. He is for you. And He only wants goodness for you. By praying you’ll be able to process your thoughts and concerns, share your burdens with someone who really cares (Jesus), and entrust the very best advocate to help your Thanksgiving be better than you imagined.  his is what the holiday is all about.
We’re told to “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18). This doesn’t mean we have to give thanks FOR all circumstances, but IN them. Holidays can be hard sometimes. We might be missing someone or the travel or the hosting might feel overwhelming in our current season. We might be coming into Thanksgiving sick or exhausted. But God still has goodness for us. Despite our circumstances. If we’re worn out, we can thank God for a cozy quilt or a morning where we can sleep in. If we’re missing someone we can thank God for our lovely memories with them. If we’re struggling with dietary restrictions, we can thank God that someone was so intentional and made gluten free stuffing or pie. If we have to be with someone who pushes our buttons we can thank God for someone else in the room who makes us laugh. We can thank God for watching A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving or getting to see our aunt that we only see once a year or kids who are singing silly turkey songs or outlining their hands and turning the drawings into turkeys. When we give thanks dopamine and serotonin are released in our brains–happy chemicals. Giving thanks brings us joy. God knew this all along, that’s why He instructed us to give thanks in all circumstances. Because no matter what our circumstances, He wants us to experience joy. I can’t promise your Thanksgiving will be perfect or easy. But if you embrace how God created you, take care of yourself, pray, and give thanks to God, your Thanksgiving will be the best possible Thanksgiving it can be this year. And speaking of being thankful, I’m thankful for all of YOU for reading and joining me as we tear down the lies of this world together so we can more fully live in Jesus’ truth. Happy Thanksgiving! For more inspiration find me on Facebook and Instagram We moved our 22-year old son to Michigan this week. He was on a ministry tour most of this summer, but up until this week he has always lived in Oxford where we live. We move our 19-year old daughter back to college tomorrow. Also, our baby starts his junior year of high school tomorrow. Friends, I need so much right now. I need prayers and I need Kleenex. I may or may not have said out loud, “I need chocolate.” But what I really need is Jesus.  a U-Haul in the rain--all part of the process As I’ve chatted with other friends over the last couple of weeks, they all need things too. For some, money is tight and an unexpected bill showed up and they need some finances to go exactly right. For others their body isn’t working the way they want it to work. They need healing and patience with themselves. Other women I’ve chatted with need discernment. They have opportunities and options and ideas and want to do the right thing. Other friends have mentioned they need more time, someone to answer the phone so they can make headway on an issue, a chance to catch their breath, help with a relationship. But honestly, what they all need is the same thing I need and the same thing you need, too–Jesus. How can I be so sure one guy is the end all solution to all our needs? Well, Psalm 23 tells us, The Lord is my shepherd, I have EVERYTHING I need. So when we let Jesus shepherd us, we truly have everything we need. Sound kind of general? Or to good to be true? Still not sure how that applies to your specific situation? Let’s take a look at what we need, who Jesus is, and how those line up. Need peace? Stressed out? Anxious? Jesus is the Prince of Peace and His peace surpasses all understanding. “For a child will be born to us, a son will be given to us; And the government will rest on His shoulders; And His name will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Eternal Father, Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6).” And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7).  Need protection? Scared? Vulnerable? Jesus is our protector “The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior; my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety. He is my refuge, my savior (2 Samuel 22:2-3).” Need comforting? Sad? Maybe even heart broken? Jesus is our comforter. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort (1 Corinthians 1:3). Need provision? Out of time or money or resources? Jesus is our provider. And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:19). Need a friend? Lonely? Jesus promises to always be there for you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age (Matthew 28:20). Not sure where to go or what to do? Jesus will direct your steps. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take (Proverbs 3:6). I don’t know where you need to put these verses to remember. I don’t know which one will resonate with you most today. But write it out. Make it your screen saver. Look it up in your Bible and underline it. Pray it out loud. This is truth.
I’m reminded of that scene in It’s a Wonderful Life when there’s a run on the Bailey Savings & Loan. One woman says her husband hasn’t worked in months. Another person has doctor bills. Everyone needs money for different reasons and seemingly out of nowhere Mary shows up holding a wad of cash and shouts, “How much do you need?” Miraculously, it seems, each person’s need is met by the money in Mary’s hand. The clock strikes. The bank closes. And there are even a couple of dollars left over. It didn’t run out. That’s just what a fictional newlywed can do (Mary is awesome by the way) but think of how much incredibly more Jesus is capable of. He has everything in His hands that you and I need, an abundance of it. It won’t run out. Sure, there will still be days we need Kleenex and doctors and chocolate and time and our paycheck to clear. But with Jesus’ mighty, awesome, powerful, holy, eternal self on our side? Who can be against us? And why should we fear? Jesus is everything we need. Free Bible Study....
While on vacation our family went to Mellow Mushroom for trivia night and their delicious pizza (I love the Great White with sundried tomatoes, fresh basil, olive oil and ricotta). The Trivia Master asked questions about Taylor Swift, what kind of car Knight Rider drove, the ingredients in soy sauce, how high fleas can jump, and so many more. I knew the answers to some questions like: Who sang “Chain of Fools”? Aretha Franklin. And some I had zero idea like: Who was the first president to live in the White House?  The super fun interior of Mellow Mushroom with bikes hanging from the ceiling. But I didn’t have to know about the White House, because my 17-year old son is a history buff and loves presidents. He whipped John Adams out of his brain faster than kids jump in the pool when the lifeguard blows their whistle signaling adult swim is over. I also didn’t need to know about baseball or bones because my mom, daughters, and husband knew all kinds of trivia I was clueless about. And when none of us knew the answers, we laughed at the ridiculously obscure questions and made silly guesses. It didn’t all depend on me. I wasn’t fully responsible. No one expected me to have all the answers. Because I had a team. The same holds true for life. You don’t have to have all the answers, run damage control, sort through the emotions, or do all the work by yourself. God never intended for us to do life alone. As soon as God finished making the first human, God said, “It’s not good for man to be alone.” Then God immediately made Eve, so Adam wouldn’t have to do life solo. God knew from the get go we are better together. And yet…  Genesis 2:18 We wrestle with decisions all by ourselves not wanting to inconvenience or worry the people around us. We start something new and hesitate to share our ideas or dreams, because we don’t want to be critiqued or dismissed. We try to do all the things for all the people without asking for help, because we don’t want to let anyone down. Or maybe we just like things done our way. Or maybe we’re plain stubborn. We keep our mental health struggles to ourselves, because we worry what others might think, or because we don’t want to be a burden. We try to figure things out solo, because surely we’re clever enough to do so or we don’t want to appear weak or less than. But what if someone could give us helpful tips or lend a hand or carry some of our load or be a safe place to process? It is not good for man (or woman) to be alone. We are currently experiencing an epidemic of loneliness noted by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services in a recent report as something that’s “damaging the health of individuals and our society.” The report goes on to state, "Relationships help our overall well-being, and lead to healthier and more fulfilled and productive lives.” Being alone increases our risk of dementia, depression, heart disease, anxiety, and stroke. As God was saying, “It’s not good for people to be alone.” Listen, I’m an introvert, so doing things solo is my natural tendency. And I’m a writer, so my job largely consists of stringing words together on my laptop–by myself. So, I need to be intentional about not isolating. I have to schedule walks and coffee dates with friends. I have to make an effort to blurt feelings and ideas out around the table or on the phone with people I love and trust. And when I share what’s on my mind, what I’m excited about, what I’m struggling with, what I’m dreaming and scheming and praying about with close, trusted friends or family, I’m a better version of myself. I get support and insights and ideas. I’m asked great questions, given wise suggestions, and feel seen and heard. People pray for me and check back to see how things are going. I receive love. And it’s beautiful. You can have all this too!  Working together, we won the first round of trivia--and got $20 off our pizza that night. What’s going on in your life? What are you most excited about? Struggling the most with? What’s your first thought when you wake up? The thing that’s keeping you up at night? The thing you’re praying your heart out about?
Does anyone know about it? Why not? Try inviting someone you trust, someone who loves Jesus and will keep you pointed toward Him into what’s occupying your time, heart, and mind. Ask for help if you need it or get it off your chest or explain that you just really need someone to listen. It will do wonders. God has always intended us to share our lives. Friendship appears over and over in the Bible as a way people got through some extremely high highs and low lows. King David had his best friend Jonathan. Ruth had Naomi. Jesus surrounded himself with the disciples. We weren’t meant to do life alone. We’re better off when we share the struggles, triumphs, and even random ideas of our lives with others. Who knows, if you do, you might even win at trivia. For more inspiration find me on Facebook and Instagram Does someone you care about struggle with their mental health (maybe even you)? If so, how can you help? Seeking help from a mental health professional is always the best and most important first step. But you can make a difference right now. Where should you start?  Make sure you and the people you love are taking care of themselves. 1. Take care of their physical needs. Our mental health wobbles when we’re not taking care of ourselves, so basic self care is a great place to start. Are they eating enough? Sleeping enough? Moving their bodies? Are they staying hydrated? If not, help out how you can. Bring the person you care about a charcuterie tray or a meal or take them out to one of their favorite restaurants. Deliver a goodie bag of their favorite hydrating beverages–La Croix or some other flavored fizzy water or a box of their favorite tea with a jar of local honey. Invite them on a walk or a bike ride or to kick the soccer ball around with you (it is World Cup season, after all). Suggest they get some sleep–go to bed early, take a nap, etc. Jesus did this. He fed crowds (John 6:5-13). He made sure the disciples were eating and resting (Mark 6:31). He cared about the people around Him and their basic needs. We can too. 2. Be a calming presence. Lean back, breathe deeply and slowly, speak in a calm voice, light a candle, or play some soft music. We live in a loud, hurried world. Show the person you love what peace looks like–that it is available. Jesus calmed the storms at sea, showing the disciples peace was accessible to them even when they least expected it (Mark 4:35-41). We can also offer the people we care about a glimpse of calm.  1 Peter 5:7 3. Check in. When we’re alone is when our thoughts tend to spiral. We worry about the what ifs instead of focusing on the now. When we’re alone is when Satan loves to slither in and whisper lies to us. Make sure you’re not alone and the people you care about aren’t alone, that they have someone to talk to. Remind them that they are seen. That they matter. Jesus made sure the disciples traveled in pairs, not solo (Luke 10:1). Jesus approached people no one else would consider speaking to or even getting near. He didn't want them to feel isolated (John 4:7-27, Matthew 8:1-3). From the get go God knew it wasn't good for people to be alone (Genesis 2:18). We can follow Jesus’ lead and send the text, better yet make the call, even better knock on and open doors to make sure the people we care about are doing okay. If you’re worried about someone’s safety, seek professional help immediately. 4. Pray. There’s just nothing like prayer. The God of the Universe, the Creator of All Things is just waiting for you to talk to Him. He loves you and every single person on earth so very much. He created us all. He died for us all. He cares about our mental health. Jesus wants to flood us with hope, joy, and peace. When we talk to Jesus, it sets things in motion. Prayer costs nothing. It doesn’t require any knowledge or skill set. All you have to do is start telling Jesus what’s on your mind. Peter, one of Jesus’ very best friends, tells us: “Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you” (1 Peter 5:7). Peter saw first hand that Jesus cares so much about you and me, that we can hand over all our troubles and fears and concerns to Him. Ask Jesus to help the people you love(and yourself) with their mental health. I’ll get us started: Dear Jesus, please flood me and ______ with your peace, hope, and love.  5 Minute Devotions for Teens: A Guide to God and Mental Health releases December 6 5. Grab them a copy of my new book, 5 MInute Devotions for Teens: A Guide to God and Mental Health It releases one week from today! I wrote this book as a way for people to quickly connect with Jesus, and in doing so, also care for their mental health. The short devotions are catered to teens, but early readers are saying, “It’s great for ALL ages, even adults.” Each page has a Bible verse, devotion, and prayer or activity. These books make great stocking stuffers for kids, grandkids, nieces and nephews, anyone you love. Maybe even sneak an extra in your own stocking. It’s amazing how many scientific tips for caring for our mental health are Biblical. Jesus loves us so much. He always has our best interest in mind, and cares so much about our mental health. Praying for you, for your mental health, and for the mental health of those you love. What does it mean to love God? Because Jesus tells us the greatest commandment is to love the Lord our God with all our heart, with all our soul, and with all our mind (Matthew 22:37), so therefore it seems fairly important. I think it’s the same as to love anyone else we love.  Think about someone you love–like your sister or best friend or spouse or parent or child–someone you would do just about anything for. Think of all the things loving them means to you. This is how we are supposed to love God. I think of my kids–I love spending time with them. If one of them says, “Hey, want to sit with me on the porch while I eat lunch?” Or “I’m running to the store, do you want to come with me?” If at all humanly possible I answer, “Yes!” Because being with them brings me great joy. Whether that’s just running errands or sharing a meal or a lovely adventure at a show, museum, restaurant, whatever. It’s the same with Jesus. I want to spend time with Him. I really look forward to spending time with Jesus in both the big events and the everyday occurrences.  And my mom? I really want to know what she has to say. I want to lean in close when she speaks. I want to hear about her childhood, and the cookout she went to last night at her neighbor’s and her doctor’s appointment and her tennis match. I learn so much from her about how to love others and enjoy life and be positive. I also just get a kick out of hearing her stories. The same is true with Jesus. I want to hear what He has to say about everything. I look forward to opening my Bible and seeing what He did, with who, and what He said to them. I’m eager to learn from all the things He thought were important enough to put in His living word, the Bible. I also want to share things with the people I love. I want to share everything with my husband. I want to tell Him about what I’m reading and this idea I have for a chapter I’m writing and who I saw at the grocery. I want to tell Him about my dreams and concerns and hopes and the thing I saw on social media that made me giggle. I want to do the same with Jesus–tell Him what’s on my mind, what I’m experiencing, where I’m really excited and where I’m really struggling. I trust Him with my heart and my emotions, with all the things.  Humans, although amazing, are sometimes hard to love, because we’re unreliable and moody and we mess up. I know I do. But Jesus is easy to love, because He’s dependable and constant and never makes mistakes. He always wants what’s best for us. God is filled with unfailing love and faithfulness (Exodus 34:6, John 1:14). He loves us perfectly and faithfully. Which makes me want to hang out with Him and listen to Him and tell Him what’s on my heart.
Loving God is like loving anyone else. Only better. Because the way He loves us back is bigger than we can hope or imagine love could ever be. For more inspiration find me on Facebook and Instagram We had these old gross towels that we’ve had for twenty-six years (yup, wedding gifts). They were great at the time, but now some of them have holes, many are fraying, and quite frankly some of them stink. Right after Christmas I bought some nice, new towels on a ridiculously low priced clearance. And you all! They are so thick and fluffy. Every time I dry my hands or get out of the shower I am amazed by how lovely these towels are. I also wonder why I waited so long to upgrade.  These new towels are so thick and fluffy I can barely stand it. I know it sounds silly. But I was settling. And sometimes we do–for old towels or a quick meal or a pair of shoes our growing child will probably only wear once or twice. But God doesn’t want us to settle for the big stuff. Are you doing things that fulfill you? Hanging out with people who make your life rich and full? Taking classes or doing things that challenge you? Finding ways to laugh and learn? Taking care of yourself mentally and physically? Because that’s what Jesus wants for you. An abundant life. An overflowing life. A rich, full, joyful, satisfying life! He tells us: "But I have come to give you everything in abundance, more than you expect—life in its fullness until you overflow!" –John 10:10 TPT  John 10:10 Do you love your job or volunteer work? Does it bring you satisfaction? Do you use some specific skill or talent that God gave you when you’re there? Or are you settling? Sure, there are parts of every job that are an absolute grind–filling out the forms, cleaning the bathrooms, or maybe attending the staff meetings. And sometimes we do jobs with the sole purpose of paying our bills. Years ago, I waitressed while interning at an advertising agency that didn’t pay me a cent, unless you count parking. I waitressed in the evenings and on weekends to pay my bills (which was not my dream job) and interned during normal work hours (which was my dream job and led to an actual job). It worked. Maybe you’re working a job to help pay for your education or certification, or because the flexible hours allow you to be around for someone you love or to spend time on that creative endeavor you’re so excited about. And that’s awesome. Because you’re not settling. You’re chasing after that education, family, or dream. You’re seizing the abundant life God has for you. Is the person you’re in a relationship with someone who brings out the best in you, who encourages you to be the amazing person God created you to be? Are your friends people who build you up, love you for just who you are, listen well, pray for and with you? Are they there for you when you need them? Or are you settling? Since you are an individual, you’re not going to agree with anyone 100% of the time. You won’t always think things should be done the same way or at the same speed or for the same reasons. And your friends or spouse or boy/girlfriend have their own responsibilities and lives to tend to. They can’t be there for you 24/7. But, you know what I mean. If you’re friends or significant other takes you for granted, doesn’t listen to or respect your wishes, doesn’t encourage your faith life, only wants to do things their way, God has more for you. Jesus doesn’t want you to settle. He loves you too much. The Bible says before you were even born, God chose you and called you by His marvelous grace (Galatians 1:15). Get that? You are chosen. You have a special calling from the God of the Universe. So, no, you shouldn’t settle.  Are you settling? Or living in God's abundance? I don’t know what that means for you today. But hopefully it means being reminded of all the amazing things God has in store. Hopefully it means ditching something that does not bring life to you–that committee you’re on that completely drains you, that “friend” who only texts when they need something “desperately,” that book you’re reading that is inappropriate (put it down, there’s so many great reads out there!), the date who won’t go to church with you and who never seems to remember that crowds make you uneasy or that you’re allergic to nuts. Or maybe it's time to quit that activity that makes you grumpy. Step one is getting rid of the things that deplete you. Step two is talking to Jesus about what He has for you. Ask Him. Right now. It’s as easy as praying: Jesus, I love You so much! Thank You for choosing me, for giving me a special calling, for Your amazing grace. Please show me how to step out of anything I'm settling for and into the abundant life You have waiting for me. Please help me keep my eyes, ears, and heart open to all You offer. Amen FREE Bible Study: 10 Minutes for 10 Days
I was driving behind a college student riding a Lime scooter the other day who jumped off in the middle of the sidewalk and started running. Yes, part of the beauty of these motorized rental scooters is as soon as you’re at work, home, your friends’ apartment, favorite coffee shop, or whatever you set the scooter to the ground. Lime has trackers, gathers the two-wheeled wonders at the end of the day and redistributes them at key places people can utilize them the following day. But this girl didn’t exactly look like she’d gotten to where she was going. I’m guessing she ran out of her prepaid limit. As the scooter hit the pavement it hit me that so often, we treat God like this.  an abandoned Lime scooter We pick Him up when we’re in the mood or use Him when we need help getting somewhere, then when we feel better about ourselves or our situation, have gotten as far as we want, or have invested as much as we wanted to in our relationship with Jesus we drop Him to the ground. Boom! This could mean spending time with Jesus in the morning and then living our lives however we want the rest of the day without regard to truly loving our neighbors or ourselves. Or praying in times of crisis but patting ourselves on the back when our life seems to be going well. Maybe we do all our Bible study homework or sing at church, but at home have an addiction we’re not willing to turn over to the Lord. Or we tell someone we’re praying for them and never do. Or say we trust Jesus and then positively freaking out when things don’t go as planned. Any of these hit home? Most of us are guilty of at least one if not several of these. Not because we’re bad people, but because we’re people. And, well, people aren’t perfect. But thankfully Jesus is. And the kicker? Our perfect King and Savior wants to be in a relationship with you and me, no matter how late we’re running or how many times we’ve crashed to the pavement. Still we treat Jesus like a rented ride, and that’s not how healthy relationships work. Healthy relationships possess what psychologists call the three C’s—communication, compromise and commitment. 1. Are we communicating with Jesus on a regular basis? Do we take time to talk to Him? The spiritual word for this is prayer, but it’s really just talking to Jesus like you would to your best friend. This means telling Him what’s on your mind today, what you’re excited about, what you’d like to accomplish, who you’re mad at and why, what you’re worried or stressed about, how you’re feeling physically, spiritually, emotionally. And also listening, because communication is a two-way street. You can do this by reading the Bible, this is God’s living Word, so reading it is listening to Jesus speak. Not sure where to start? Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John all actually have Jesus’ words to the world—sometimes even in red print. And the letters to the early churches like; Romans, Corinthians, Galatians, Philippians, Ephesians, Thessalonians, etc. are all instructions for the early church on what being a Christian means. Listening to Jesus also means sitting still and being quiet, asking Him a question like, “How do I handle this person I struggle with? What should I say to them? Not say to them?” or “I’m wondering if adding this thing into my schedule is the best use of my time, what do You think?” And then sitting in stillness and allowing the Lord time to respond.  Are you talking to Jesus like you would your best friend? 2. Are we compromising—giving up some of our preferences for His? Will we bite our tongue even though we really want to complain? We know Jesus urges us to love our neighbor. He doesn’t want us to trash talk them, so will we, or won’t we? Will we tell the cashier they gave us too much change, even though the money is already in our hands? Will we set down that thing we know is bad for us when God asks us too? Even though we’re craving it? All of these are us comprising our preferences for His. And, as it turns out, God’s choices for us are always best, because He is 100% pure goodness and light. 3. Commitment—are we committed to Jesus? Do we take time from our days to spend with the Lord—in prayer, silence, listening to or singing worship music, reading the Bible, meeting with other Christians for support in our faith journeys? Are we committed to do this on a regular basis? Daily is ideal. Daily kissing my hubby, sharing a meal with him, going on a walk with him, etc. are ideal for our relationship. There are days when conflicting schedules mean we have to miss. But we still touch base on those days—text, call, or even when Brett had to take a trip to Nepal, we emailed each other because the ten-hour forty-five-minute time change was crazy hard. But we made an effort to communicate. We were committed.  Are you engaging in the three C's of relationship with Jesus? Same goes with our relationship with Jesus. If we’re committed to Him, we’ll daily want to sit with our Bibles and pray, but on crazy days, we’ll make exceptions and pray on the airplane or while driving a car full of middle schoolers to practice or in the shower. We might let the audio feature on the Bible App read us a passage or listen to some great Mav City tunes while getting dressed. No matter our schedules, we need to make it a point to touch base with the Lord every day.
So, are we in a relationship with Jesus? Or are we dropping Him to the ground like a scooter we don’t need right this minute? Because He’s the best friend we could ever ask for. He loves us for exactly who we are. Always listens. Always keeps His promises. Never stands us up or lets us down. He’s always on the side of good. Life with Jesus is always exhilarating, so hop on, commit, compromise, and communicate and enjoy the most amazing ride of your life. |
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